Panama’s Album Review: Beyonce - B’Day (3/5 Afro-Picks)
[***EDIT: I've created a new blog to chronicle the goings ons of the Wednesday night Open Mic at Bohemian Caverns. The new and good googly moogly Stock13 Report should be checked out for your livelihood and well being. Umm...its at Blogger so just pretend it's shiny and sexxy. A link has been added to the right as well. Come one, come all.***]
Happy Birthday! (Yeah that’s to you…)
I read somewhere (I think on MTV) that Beyonce said it took her something like two weeks to complete this album.
After hearing it, my first response is: Well, no shit.
Oh, I will be making some disparaging comments about MTV a little bit later on in this album review, I just don’t feel like it right now. It might break up my flow.
Beyonce returns with her second solo offering on September 5, as a follow up to her huge-selling and hit spawning album, Dangerously In Love. To be fair, I didn’t really like that album all that much either. It had its hot moments, but as a whole work…bleh.
Before I get started, I’d like to say that I’m getting a little bit tired of these artists coming out and basically releasing other people’s albums under their own name. Oh, I see you have no clue what I’m talking about. Let me explain. Way back in like 1997 before anybody knew who he was, a light skinned, huge yellow pant wearing, and fresh-from-jail Chico DeBarge descended upon Morehouse College’s campus with one popular Tracy Lee (of “It’s Party Time” fame). They both were signing autographs and nobody went to Chico’s line. At the time Tracy Lee was popular…talk about short lived popularity.
Well, not to be discouraged by anybody’s lack of Nobody-Gives-A-Shit-Itis, Chico managed to release one of the best albums of 1997/1998. The only problem was that he didn’t release his own album, he released D’Angelo’s follow up to Brown Sugar causing D’Angelo to have to go into the lab and record Voodoo and change his style altogether. And we all know how that one turned out.
Actually pretty good, but that’s neither here nor there.
[***Sidenote: There seem to be two different schools of thought on D'Angelo: either you're a Brown Sugar person or a Voodoo person. Me? I'm a Brown Sugarer. Okay, that sounded gay. But you get my point. Voodoo is an amazing work and signalled his departure from normalcy and was clearly done in the vein of simplicity and lots of cocaine, but nothing gets me like "Me and Those Dreamin' Eyes of Mine". In my own attempts to release a classic album that divides fans that I don't have yet, I've taken to heron blunts laced with Lysol. Thank you. ***]
Then in another case of mistaken identity, in 2005, Jon Legend released his multi-platinum album, Get Lifted, to much critical acclaim and commercial applause. Much to the chagrin of one Carl Thomas since basically, Jon released Carl Thomas’ third solo album. Not that it wasn’t a good album, but here goes little Jon Stephens parading around the world singing songs that Carl knows he should have been singing. It’s been storied that Carl Thomas was last seen on the ledge on the 15th floor of a hotel in NYC yelling to anybody that will listen that “he’s just an ordinary person…and the only place he knows to go is down…” I sure hope that the summer rain doesn’t make the ledge slipperly, what with him being all emotional and everything. He might actually jump.
Well, Beyonce has joined in the latest line of album jackers. You see, this album has a decidedly different bent to it than what you’d expect from Beyonce. Her vocal stylings, the beat selections, the overall unimaginativeness of the concepts…it would seem that Beyonce has gone and released…
…Amerie’s third album.
Even stole her singing style on a few songs. No, that’s not a good thing. Not exactly a bad thing either but you never hear anybody say that Amerie can sing. We all just talk about the “1 Thing” video and her legs.
You know, she has really nice legs that Amerie does.
The Amerie-esqueness of this album can be felt right from the beginning on the album’s opening track, the summer wood-classic, “Deja Vu”. The shrill yelling she’s doing on this track are very resemblent of Amerie. Hell it’s damn near her trademark right now. Sing as if every song hurts. And not in the pain from the heart, but more like pain from the spleen and pancreas. If you’d asked me back in May when this song leaked if it would have been a dud, I’d say you’re crazy.
Apparently we were all had. It could be the formulaic nature of it, or the just blah feel of it that didn’t really resonate with anybody in the club. But do you know why the song tanked? Like the real reason?
There’s no dance you can identify with it. Everybig hit that’s come out this summer has had some dance that could be easily identified with it. Take Yung Joc’s Pantheon level club banger (and my vote for best song of the year). Who can’t do that? Or Lil Jon’s “Snap Yo’ Fingers”. Or E-40’s “Tell Me When To Go”. For God’s sake, even E-40 had a hit!!!
This is also her fault since when she came out back in 2003 with “Crazy In Love” she had the Beyonce Booty Bounce that women across the nation, ass or not, were enthralled with as men watched. It was the dance that kept on giving. Everybody could participate.
Beyonce…there is no deja vu.
By the way, there are only 10 new songs on this album. Two weeks indeed.
Swizz Beatz comes through on the second track “Get Me ‘Bodied” and recycles the same beat he’s given to damn near everybody. It was cool at first, you know the loud claps and stutter-stop beats, but now its just annoying as the living fuck. Especially since he’s been doing it for like years now. Swizzle must be stopped. Oh…yeah, this song just isn’t that good.
Now the Amerie-ness really kicks off. The third song “Suga Mama” sounds like it came straight from the Amerie vaults, which is a shame because this would have been a great song for Amerie to return with. I’m not sure if he produced it or not, but if this isn’t a Rich Harrison track, then somebody is straight studying ole boy’s style. You could close your eyes and hear Amerie all over this. Mind you, the song is banging like shit…this is hot enough for men and women alike to bump down the street at elderly-death levels.
Oh, since I didn’t say this, Beyonce can clearly sing better than Amerie. So there is SOME vocality here…just not so much. And umm, she begins this song by saying “Damn, that was so good, makes me wanna buy him a short set.”
Beyonce should not speak on her songs ever again.
Don’t you love how long this is?
The song “Freakum Dress” is another un-inspired ass song that sounds like an Amerie throwaway. Not much to say here since it called “Freakum Dress”…basically, you should your put freakum (as in freak him) dress on. Once again, there is nothing to most of these songs. If you thought “Bootylicious” was lyrical mastery, well, you will not be disappointed.
And for the record, I happened to love “Bootylicious”.
The song “Upgrade U” featuring Jay-Z is one that’s grown on me. Basically, having her in your life will result in her upgrading you from lifestyle. I assume it means you’ll eat better as well.
But get this people…she actually says this line:
“I’ll do for you what Martin did for the people…”
And I KNOW she ain’t talking about Martin Lawrence who was last seen toting a gun somewhere around Florence and Normandie in Los Angeles. That Beyonce, just when you think she can’t do more for Black America, she goes and offers to provide racial healing.
God bless Beyonce. Viva la Civil Rights Movement. I wonder how Coretta feels about that?
“Kitty Kat” (I mean are you reading these song titles???) is pretty hot…well, I like it anyway. But the shining star on the album is in the Neptunes produced track “Green Light”. This song has three different movements (okay not really, but work with me). It goes from dance to funk to R&B-ish all in 3:29. And its aboutu giving a man a green light. You know, she definitely went for the Snakes On A Plane approach with these song titles. Just left nothing to the imagination at all. This SHOULD have been a single. In fact either this or “Suga Mama” should have been singles instead of both “Deja Vu” or “Ring The Alarm”.
Ah yes, I forgot about “Ring the Alarm”. I do not like this song at all. And I think the video blows. But I don’t like this song for one reason:
Fergie’s song “London Bridge” is like 10 times better and they sound too similar to me.
Plus, why she yelling? And where in the Hell did she get the inspiration for this? I mean its clearly not about Rihanna, that’s been stated numerous times, so where is the pent up aggression coming from? Is she upset about Jay-Z’s mother hanging around too much? Is that the girl on his arm? Inquiring minds would like to know.
The album closes out with two songs where she does prove that she can still sing, “Irreplaceable” and “Resentment”. These are less dancy type numbers and more the mid-tempo stuff that would have fit on the last album. On “Irreplaceable” she breaks down how basically she can find another man if need be. Jay-Z beware. And “Resentment”…well if you guessed it had ANYTHING to do with resentment, congratulations, you can read.
Oh my favorite line from “Irreplaceable” is: “to the left to the left, everything you own in a box to the left…”
Let ‘em know B…let ‘em know!!!
Oh yes, I was going to say something about MTV, the bastards. There is this group out of B-Town (Berkeley, CA) called The Pack. They have a song that’s been gaining crazy momentum all over the Net. It’s called “Vans”. Perhaps you’ve heard it. Part of the chorus goes, “got my Vans on but they look like sneakers…” Shit is bananas for some reason actually. Anyway, apparently MTV initially banned the video because it comes down to being basically a 4 minute product advertisement for Vans sneakers. Well, because MTV is such a paragon of non-exploitation, they weren’t having it. AT MTV, they don’t believe in product placement, which is why they bleep out certain logos and shit from your favorite rappers videos.
Apparently, MTV doesn’t have a contract with Vans since Nelly’s damn “Air Force One’s” was ALL OVER MTV a few years ago. Or perhaps you remember Busta Rhymes featuring Puffy and Pharrell’s “Pass The Couvoisier?” You do? Good….yeah, they didn’t have any problem playing that shit. Fuck, when “Air Force One’s” hit, you couldn’t find a pair in stores anymore, they were selling like crazy.
Well, I was watching MTV Jams on Sunday and the video is on MTV now. And do you know what the compromise turned out to be?
They bleep out the word “Vans”. Yes, the song’s namesake. What kind of shit is that??? I tell you, at least attempt to shield the BS you’re throwing at me…I mean good got damn. Nike is okay, but 4 niggas from Cali start singing about Vans (and throwing AF1’s away in the video, kind of funny actually), and we got to bleep it out.
Pussies.
Back to Beyonce…so this album isn’t great at all. And it’s low spots are pretty low, “Freakum Dress” in particular. It seems like she wrote that shit in something under 3 minutes and just said, fuck it. But the high points are great, particularly “Suga Mama” and “Green Light” and I’ll even add “Kitty Kat”. The rest of the songs teeter on blah to okay. Is it groundbreaking? No. Is it something for the hoodrats to cling too? Definitely. So it just hits right around better-than-mediocre-right-around-average.
Overall, its listenable but I don’t think it has much staying power, mostly because its short as the fuck and none of the songs is SO outstanding (i.e. “Crazy In Love”) that it will keep the album in people’s minds for a long time. It will go platinum (hell it’s Beyonce) but nobody will be talking about this years from now…
…except for Amerie who should be really pissed right now since Rich Harrison just gave away her next single to Beyonce.
And we all know how bad she needs a breakout single, what with not being able to sing and all.
As a reference, just go and listen to Destiny Fulfilled. It’s a MUCH better listening experience and you won’t even miss this shit. However, as of 9am this morning, it’s been proven that this album can grown on you…
Track Listing for B’ Day (realase September 5, 2006)
1. Deja Vu featuring Jay-Z
2. Get Me Bodied
3. Suga Mama
4. Upgrade U featuring Jay-Z
5. Ring The Alarm
6. Kitty Kat
7. Freakum Dress
8. Green Light
9. Irreplaceable
10. Resentment
11. Bonus Cuts: Check On It, Listen (from Dreamgirls Sdtk), Get Me Bodied Extended Version (I know not why they thought this was a good idea)
August 28th, 2006 12:15
To quote Christina Aguilera “everyone is using the same producers and everything sounds the same.”
“except for Amerie who should be really pissed right now since Rich Harrison just gave away her next single to Beyonce.”
You pretty much said it all right here. I might buy B’Day on bootleg tho. Gotta bump something in my car lol.
August 28th, 2006 13:09
Can I be both a Brown Sugar girl, AND a Voodoo girl? Is it possible to be both?
I love “When We Get By” and “Shit Damn Motherfucker” - the version off Live From The Jazz Cafe.
But. But his “Feels Like Making Love” makes me feel like… well, you know.
D’Angelo, come back to me!
August 28th, 2006 13:35
*SIGH*
After hearin it all the way through more than a few times, i have to agree with you. Except I think I liked all the songs you hated and hated all the songs you liked. Except for Irreplacable, that onces cool.
I am disappointed, it doesn’t sound like I thought it would. I’m sure she probably said its different somewhere int he press. Whatever. I just don’t like how most of the songs sound alike, excluding Irreplacable and Resentment. It’s cool to explore and be different, but not 8 tracks worth on a 10 track album. At least on Dangerously In Love she had more of a mix of song style.
And yes the Martin line made me say WTF?
August 28th, 2006 14:11
I would quote X-tina but her album is also a rather hot plate of crapola. At least 70% of it. (ie: 100% of what Primo didn’t do.)
Speaking of new albums did you hear that new Prince album? Didn’t? Perhaps its because he is releasing it under his new name: Justin Timberlake. Honestly, the new JT album is pretty good (Even if it should be called “Prince and Timbo Save Another Career” instead of FutureSex / LoveSounds… but I digress) but it sounds like the Prince album he hasn’t been able to make since.. hmmm.. dare I say… Lovesexy?
As for B, I thought Green Light was done by Harrison. I mean she even did the Woooooahooohohhhhhhhhhh that Amerie did in “1 Thing”. In fact, the reason it’s hot is because it sounds like a 1 Thing remix (in the same way “Take This Ring” did). Not to say that all three aren’t enjoyable though. I think I still prefer the Harrison ala Toni Braxton the most, actually.
Anyway, B’day is crap. I actually sort of like Irreplacable because of it’s guilty pleasure catchiness and hate Kitty Kat because of it’s innate lameness… but otherwise I think we are of similar mind on this mess. I can’t believe she would release it but then again standards are pretty low these days… but this could also just be the sophmore jinx.
August 28th, 2006 14:39
So wait. Are you saying I shouldn’t pre-order it from Amazon or that I shouldn’t sneak out of work and walk down to the borders and buy it right when they open?? I actually like the Ring The Alarm song. I love her anger and craziness. Crazy is entertaining.
August 28th, 2006 15:20
@The Hostess: I don’t mind craziness…but where the hell is she trumping it up from. Is she just naturally nuckin’ futs??? I mean I can believe that and all…
But uh yeah, you should go get it as soon as possible. Let’s send this sucker platinum in the first week. I mean, hell, I still love her.
August 29th, 2006 13:00
aS ALWAys u leave me in stitches…u hit everything right on the nose and maybe thats why I didnt cop John Legend but I had Carl Thomas last CD…it was HOT!!!I wouldnt go as far t osay Beyonce reminds me of Amerie. ON Ring the Alarm she reminded me of Kelis..and it was funny on MTV Jams yesterday they played Ring the ALarm then they played Caught out THere..so u be the judge? MTV Is funny!!!I like that song by the Pack Northen Cali is making some noise right now
September 2nd, 2006 16:55
YALL ARE SO DUMB OON THIS SITE. LIKE I BE DAMN IF SHE SOUND LIKE AMERIE,…SHIT NO COMPARISON THEIR. THE ALBUM TO ME IS FIRE. IM SORRY I CAN RELATE TO ALMOST EVERYTHING IS TALKING ON THE TRACK ESPECIALY THE SON CALLED “LISTEN”. “RESENTIMENT” IS FOR ALL THE WOMEN THAT THEIR MAN CHEATED ON THEM AND TEHY TOOK THEM BACK. “IRREPLACEABLE” IS LETTING THAT NIGGA KNOW THAT SHIT KEEP ACTING UP, U CAN BE REPALCED IN A MINUTE. U REALLY DONT KNOW ME, SHIT I FEEL HER. AND SHIT “fREAKUM DRESS” WE ALL HAVE THAT DRESS IN THE CLOSET WHEN YOUR MAN ACTS UP YOU PUT ON TO GET HIM MAD TO GET THAT ATTENTION. SHE MAKE MUSIC FOR THE PUBLIC AND ITS SAD TO SAY BUT MORE WOMAN EXPERIENCE BAD RELATIOSNHIPS THAN GOOD ONES. SO SHE IS WRITING FOR THEM RIGHT NOW. SHIT “RING THE ALARM”, THAT SONG IS FIRE BECAUSE IF YOU TAKE THE TIME TO GROOM A MAN, TEACH HIM MANNERS, MAKE HIM RESPECTFULLY AND NOW FEMALES START TO PAY ATTENTION TO HIM AND HE FORGETTING ABOUT TO BECAUSE OF THE ATTENTION HE IS GETTING NOW. THATS REAL,.SHIT I WILL BE DAMN I SEE ANOTHER CHICK ON YOUR ARM. I FEEL HER IM SORRY. AND FOR THE SONG “UPGRADE U”, SHE IS TALKING ABOUT DR. MARTING LUTHER KING JR AND HIS WIFE PLAYED TH POSITION BUT STILL HAD MAD RESPECT ON HER OWN. COME ON PEOPLE, LISTEN TO WATCH SHE IS SAYING JUST DONT HEAR IT, LISTEN TO IT. “KITTY KAT”, IS A PERFECT SONG FOR A WOMAN FOR HAVE A MAN AND SHE IS BEING PLAYED FOR SOME YOUNGER CHICK…..SHE LETTING HIM AND HER KNOW…….IM SORRY I CANT EVEN COMPARE IT TO DANGERIOUSLY IN LOVE BECAUSES ITS TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ALBUMS. AND IF SHE DIDNT SAY SHE DID THE ALBUM IN TWO WEEKS PEOPLE WOULDNT BE SAYING IT WAS A RUSHED ALBUM. LISTEN TO THE ALBUM NOT HEAR IT, AND SHUT THE FU** UP
September 6th, 2006 00:22
i love the new bday cd i think it is hot and sexy
September 6th, 2006 19:37
You are so dumb. You don’t even know what the hell our talking about! Everybody just don’t wanna see different things. It’s time for change and Beyonce did just that. And plus who are you to compare her with Amerie…oh and Amerie only has TWO albums!!! So thats how I know you don’t know what u talkin about. Also, KELIS??? C’mon now be real. All Kelis said was “I hate you soo much right now and Actually SCREAMED So how can you compare that?? PLeas all f ou get your facts straight…Ya’ll are soo like close minded.You don’t understand anything! I agree totally with the COMMENT ABOVE ME.. And if ya’ll didn’t know she did the album in 2 weeks, ya’ll wouldn’t be talkin all this shit. She said it herself, as anartiste you gotta CHANGE UP…You can’t have an artist talkin bout love all the damn time! Ya’ll are dumb, and need to shut the F*** Up….Real talk. Cuz if beonce came in ANYONE of ya’ll faces, and she asked you what you thought? YOU WOULD BE SAYIN SOME DIFFERENT SHIT. Stupid assholes
September 7th, 2006 02:20
Ummm, first of all regina, sweetie, we know Amerie only has 2 albums. The whole point to the dude’s “Third Album” statement was that B’Day sounds like it’s MEANT to be Amerie’s 3rd album. Remember, Dude spent, like, 5 minutes explaining the whole concept of people dropping albums that sound like they were meant to be someone else’s next album. So duh, since Amerie has 2 albums, he’s saying B’Day sounds like her 3rd. That’s hard to grasp? So there are no facts for him to get straight, you just plain missed what he was trying to say. So that’s on you, not him.
Second, I love Beyonce. She’s been my dream girl for years & years. But I don’t really think it’s fair to call someone an asshole if they DARE to say they don’t like her 2nd album. Beyonce’s a big enough girl to handle it, so should you be. She’s taken worse criticism in her career, as we know from 2000. I think her fans have a right to feel disappointed by the new music, IF that’s how they feel about it.
Furthermore, this is not about people refusing to accept something different. Just because something is “different” doesn’t mean you have to think it’s good. “Good” and “different” don’t have the same meaning, sweetie. Their point is they don’t feel B’Day is good, whether it’s “different” or not. So that point you made was… well, pointless.
And frankly, it’s not even about saying something different if she were right here in our faces. What, so someone’s wrong for not liking her album & having the guts to say it?? Come on Sis, I love Bee more than anyone, but you act like they’re committing a sin by saying they don’t like B’Day, and would hide that fact from her — as if it’s some kind of crime they’d be trying to hide. So there’s NEVER been someone you liked, where you didn’t necessarily like their new project? That wouldn’t be realistic. Does an Usher fan have to love EVERY fuckin’ song he did? So you’re not a real fan unless you smile & praise everything the artist does? So you’re gonna say you LOVE EVERY SINGLE SONG BEYONCE EVER DID?? EVER?? Aite then, so that’s all these people are doing. They’re fans who probably really dig Beyonce, but they just so happen to not like the quality of songs Beyonce came with on B’Day. Every artist you’re a fan of, you like everything they ever do, musically, huh. Please, take that somewhere. No disrespect, but that doesn’t sound like “Real Talk” to me.
September 7th, 2006 02:22
Just a correction from above. I meant to say Danielle, not Regina. Sorry about that.
September 8th, 2006 15:31
Ok can someone help me understand how people can credit her for being a great writer? Don’t get me wrong, I knew Beyonce had an amazing voice the very first time I heard it. But this is where her talent is - how can people continuously say she is a great writer? Especially when there are usually at least 3-4 people credited for the songs on her albums. SO you have 3-4 people who contributed to the lyrics, and half of the lyrics are from a previous song done by a different artist. What exactly is she writing? I think her writing is her downfall. Beyonce can sing the hell out of anything, which is why she was able to get away with songs like “check on it” there is no lyrical talent here. Its a person who can take words and phrases that people say eveyday and sing them (and sing them very well in her case). She has yet to make a lyrically significant song. The stuff she sings about is fantacy stuff that 16 year olds think about. She has yet to address what really goes on in adult women’s lives in a profound way, like Mary or LAurin Hill (ex-factor is one of the best break-up song’s I’ve heard). And It’s funny that she has this “independent woman, I run my own career” attitide, becuase that attitude definately doen’t show up when she does interviews. She never has anythng to say. I’m not sayng she has to break into something politically profound, but you wonder if there is anything to her beyond the performer. I am soooo sick of hearing about her family and how great everyone is. And how she lost 20 pounds for the movie (I think it is absolutley hilarious that the media made such a big deal, so she went from a size 4 to a size 2, wow what sacrafice!!!! (Don’t think for one minute she was this vuluptuous women, maybe when she was 16, but when I saw her last year back stage (yes, I won back stage passes and got to take a picture with her) I was soooo surprised at how thin she was. Not sickly thin, but certainly not the curvy “regular” women we always here about. She had curves, but they were size 4 curves) anyway back to my point, sometimes I wonder if this album was meant to be lackluster? I mean, if she does as well in dreamgirls as people have been saying, her camp might’ve wanted to allow her to lay low for a while in order to avoid overkill? We saw what happened to Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck, too much publicity can make the general public dislike you. If b’day was as contrived as I sometimes think, this is pure genius on the part of her camp. I mean the album appeared on billboard charts at #47 yesterday, now Beyonce looks like the underdog, who will redeem herself when dreamgirls comes out and everyne will love her.
September 10th, 2006 07:33
I completely agree with this review. The album sounds disjointed, she screams all the way through the album - thus the harmonies are damn near non-existent. This album not only lacks consistency, but moreover, lacks SOUL. If you want a quality album from an ex-Destiny’s Child member, check out LaToya Luckett’s album - much more attention to detail, better produced, and more importantly, it has SOUL.
December 7th, 2006 17:39
A very fun and catchy album. A few weak tracks, but overall, very satisfying. Beyonce changes her formulae from the sappy and boring side to agressive, fun and sexy. And it works. This proves that she is moving forward artistically.