We Be Burnin’
Do you have an itch that you want someone else to scratch?
Are you pissin’ razorblades and would like somebody else to piss switchblades with you?
Have you constantly wondered why all the people in the Herpes commercials seem so doggone…well…happy?
Well it’s because Michael Jackson isn’t the only obviously infected person who isn’t alone. If you need some of that good fire love, venture on over to the internet’s newest hot spot…
If you have ants in your pants and haven’t been able to find somebody who can relate to your struggle, this is the place for you.
According to the site’s co-founder, MatchSTD.com averages about 800 people looking for that new hotness per day.
‘We`re averaging about 800 members a day,’ said co-founder Bentley Dawson. ‘This all happened so quickly. We went from pretty much nothing to 15,000 hits an hour, and as of today, we`ve gotten 35,000 hits in an hour.’
I hope those hits are protected!
In all seriousness (albeit short-term seriousness), this is actually a really good idea. I mean, in today’s day and age where diseases run as rampant as Carl Lewis, I can imagine a lot of STD infected individuals having trouble on the dating scene. Though, I can’t imagine somebody with gonorrhea really feeling like swapping gonorrhea for syphillis is a good tradeoff. But that’s just my close-minded thinking.
All I know is that today, my life is better, because I know that on the off-chance that I do contract an STD, I can find me a woman who not only has the hots for me, she’ll will also have the “hots” for me. And that makes me smile.
Thank you MatchSTD.com. Anonymously sparking the fire of romance since 2006!
[***DISCLAIMER: This was very insensitive. And quite frankly, I don't give a smurf! It's been a while since I've garnered some Hell points. Now we can all burn together. Get it...burn?? *sigh* I'm on Orbitz right now booking my ticket to West Hades. ***]
